Joy

I am a very optimistic person (sometimes to a fault)! Yes, someone you probably want to punch on occasion :) You would be surprised by the amount of people who think of it as a rude way to feel and actually tell me, "I don't want to hear that it will be okay." So in those times, I just sit and pray. It is hard for me to put it aside. Don't get me wrong, I am sad and weep for them and their family, but I fully trust that God knows exactly what needs to be done. Moments of sorrow and pain make my heart ache. It is hard regardless of our faith and joy in the Lord!

How do we get this joy? When we have faith in God! I find happiness in my family, spending time alone with my husband, laughing with my children, being goofy with friends. I find happiness in cheesecake and the smell of a farmhouse basement. God gave us these things for our enjoyment, yes, but true joy is absent when we don't have a relationship with him. "The prospect of the righteous is joy, but the hopes of the wicked come to nothing." ~Proverbs 10:28

Our faith in Him is our salvation with Him! "Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy,  for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls." `~1Peter 1:8-9

I find great joy in my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. When a "bad" thing is happening, I can see good! I know that our "bad" things are not intended to bring us harm or hurt us in any way, but to teach us something. Our trials teach others around us about God's glory and point them to Him. God sees the good in our trials and so should we. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." ~James 1:2-3

No one can take away our joy! It is from God and Him alone! I see so many amazing people going through cancer, adopting children, caring for the elderly, sick parents and friends, have a slew of children, whom all have joy! This is not something they can do alone. This joy is from God! It is indescribably beautiful to witness! I am not saying we should not be sad or grieve. Jesus wept and so should we. In our moments of sorrow cling to Jesus and He WILL give us rest! (Matthew 11:28)

My prayer for you is that you see this goodness from God! You see the JOY in the difficult times, in the moments when a friend hurts you, when your children are screaming, when a friend is struggling. When we see with this perspective, we will see His good, we will see God's hand at work, we will forgive, and we will shine His joy for all to see.

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." ~Hebrews 12:2

How I Intentionally Pray For My Husband

Prayer is one of the single most important things in a marriage. When you pray for your spouse, you are inviting God to join your marriage. If you don't pray for your spouse, I urge you to start NOW! This is vital! If you are not praying for your husband's heart, character, relationships, who is? The relief is knowing that it is not our job to change our spouse (only God can do that), but we are called to pray for him on a daily basis.

I spend time every single day praying for my children, their spouses, and their present and future. I pray for their husbands and wives as they are living their lives as we speak and God is preparing them for my children. I love journalling my prayers, sermons, studies, etc. I want to be a prayer warrior for my family and all of you! I love seeing how God works through our prayers by changing others hearts and myself.

One thing that God laid on my heart this past year was to pray for my husband with intentionality and purpose. God laid a different form of prayer on my heart this year. You see, Dan gets up to go to work at 5:15 and I like to sleep a bit longer, so our mornings haven't been spent praying for each other's day. We would pray in the evening, but there is just something about starting your day off with your spouse's heart open before God and praying for you!












We started a prayer journal! Everyday we write a prayer for each other. Dan starts off every morning, then I read his prayer for me and I write one for him. This journal is just between him and me, nothing else makes its way into it. Of course, his work, being the light to his coworkers, etc enter because that is how his day is spent. For me, the kids, homeschooling, etc makes its way in because this is what my day consists of. There are no notes from sermons, friends, or Bible Studies - simply a journal between husband and wife.

The cool thing to see this past year is how our prayers have began to visibly change. We went from thanking God for each other (which we still do write, because we are) to thanking God for calling each other to Him so we can spend eternity together.

Not only is this something we will always have that shows our CONTINUAL thanksgiving and love for each other, but a HUGE testimony to our children. These prayers aren't made up or assumed, they are tangibly there, written in our handwriting, to the one person that God has gifted us to love more than anyone else on this earth.

I urge you to consider starting a prayer journal for you and your spouse. If your spouse is an unbeliever, then journal all the more. Satan will make you feel like you should give up, but fight harder. If you are not married, then start one anyways. God already sees you with that person and what a gift to give them on your wedding day. My husband and I have always had a strong marriage. We really are best friends and I know, without a doubt, he would claim this victory in Christ as well. Invite God into your marriage!

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” ~Ephesian 5:31

It Only Takes One...

Bell Ringing

A friend on Facebook reminded me to start setting up volunteer slots for the Salvation Army Bell Ringers in Geneseo. I have one Kettle and a few bells for anyone interested in giving this season. 

THIS MONEY STAYS IN GENESEO!!!!!! This money collected is for the single mom who can't afford food for her children. The dad who is working two jobs and getting by until his furnace goes out and his family is cold. For the elderly who can't make her medication payment. 

It only takes ONE shift to raise enough money to provide these necessities for those in our community. The Bell Season starts the weekend after Thanksgiving and runs to Christmas Eve. I know we are all busy and have kids, families, Bible Study, sports, etc. One evening this season for two hours is all I ask! Bring your kids, your dog, candy for kids, songs to sing, etc. GET EXCITED for this!

Set up locations are Fareway, Walgreens, Walmart, or Farm N Fleet. You can volunteer most any weeknight or weekend (day or evening). I will meet you in town to help set up and be there afterwards to collect everything. 

Please contact me by commenting to this post below, via Facebook by clicking: here or by email at: dkpshoe@hotmail.com.

"In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how He Himself said, 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'" ~ Acts 20:35

Mean it!

Today our daughter came home with an owl project of Thankfulness that she did at school. It was sort of a rough day as she is still trying to get the hang of school and everything it entails. The learning level is one that she isn't used to. She has went to more schools than she can count. Last week she left her folder at school two days in a row, so we had lots of homework to get done.

She worked diligently on her vocabulary and Geography. We reviewed her spelling words, then did a Chapter 4 Math Test Review. I was growing weary with it all, but as I was going through everything else in her folder, I found this owl picture. I took a moment to read it. It said:

Dear Parents,

What I am thankful for is a roof over my head.

I am thankful for food so I can eat.

I am also thankful for the toys you give us.

I am really thankful for you.

I love you so much.

I don't need toys, I just need you.

I asked her who this was for (she just came to live with us twelve days ago). She said with a big smile, "It's for you and daddy!" As I hugged her tightly, I couldn't help but feel my heart overflow. Overflow with joy, happiness, love, hurt, compassion, sadness, completeness. 

My birth children if asked would definitely say they are thankful for food and a home and parents. They hear far too often how blessed that makes us! But, there is something different about R's letter to us. Hers is set apart from what most of us would feel when we say we are thankful for food and a roof over our head. You see, she lived without those necessities. She lived at times with no roof over her head, with no food to eat, with no parents to care for her.

When she wrote, "I don't need toys, I just need you" she meant it. She truly knows that toys are fun, but she really just needs parents to love and care for her. Her thankfulness is deeper - It's realer - It's who she is. It is a deepness that I hope I have when I thank God for the simple things.

When Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me" he said that because their faith is one that we all should have. Because a child's perspective is one that we can all learn from. They may not get adult understanding, but they get what's important. With the life she has been dealt so far, she would have the right to be angry, but her heart is so full of compassion, love, and understanding.

I encourage you to join with me to have a deeper thanks this season. To really put yourself in another's situation and really feel what they feel. When we pray to God and thank Him for His unfailing love, mean it, truly mean it!

"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." ~2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Where is your focus?

How do you do it?

I could NEVER do that?

Where do you find the time?

Are these all yours?

You must have a huge house?

Being foster parents these are all questions we are asked on a daily basis. They used to bother me, but now I welcome them! I used to think people were being nosey or disrespectful. I sometimes felt like we were a walking circus for others amusement.

Heres the thing: I don't know if any of those above statements are true or not, but I do know this... When someone asks those questions, it gives me the opportunity to share what God is doing, what convictions He has made visible and how many hurting kids truly are hurting.

How do we do it? I don't know, haha! I seriously ask myself that question more times than I can count. It was not something I dreamed about as a child. I did not want to grow up and open my home to who knows who...or what. How do we do it? The only answer is with God! With His divine plan for our lives. My childhood was not that great on many levels, but God used that to open my heart and eyes to something far greater than I could have EVER planned.

I could NEVER do that?! Well, sometimes, I can't either! Sometimes I just need to sit - and do nothing - and hear nothing! Luckily, my loving husband encourages "me time" so I can do just that. God, then, replenishes my soul and gives me the strength to carry on.

Where do you find the time? Here's how I look at that question: Where do you find the time to shower or to brush your teeth? Where do you find the time to eat or feed your child? Where do you find the time to watch that favorite TV show or read that favorite book? We ALL have PLENTY of TIME!!! We have just decided to use it how WE want and not how GOD wants!

When we put our fleshly desires to the side, we see a whole bunch of time just popping up! Yes, I do still have favorite shows and spend LOTS of time with God on a daily basis, but orphans are a priority and God has gifted me that time because I put myself aside to follow His agenda!

Are these all yours? Yes, every single one of them! Twenty-one kids have crossed over our threshold that look to us as mommy and daddy. They are all mine until they walk over that threshold for the last time to be with their forever family! I will never specify or point out a foster child unless someone specifically asks if we are adopting or fostering. They are our children!

You must have a huge house?! Yes, we do! It is massive! If I had to take the amount of love, tenderness, compassion, leadership, selflessness, and gratefulness and bottle it up; we could fill a hundred homes!

We make time for our priorities! We make time for the things we really care about! Please don't use the "I don't have time" as an excuse! I pray Christ gives you a clear vision of His priority in your life. It all starts with our Lord, so let your focus be on Him and everything else will follow.


One of my favorite videos: http://vimeo.com/3564887

That's Weird!!

Yesterday, I found myself at a Heath Foods Store, called Greatest Grains on Earth, looking for some Brown Mustard Seeds to make Mustard for my family! While I was there I found some Chia Seeds. These sweet little seeds have had me searching for quite some time!!!! Packed full of protein, fiber and healthy fats, these seeds are tiny, but pack a super punch!!! You can add them to smoothies, bread, rolls, granola bars (or mustard...unless that's too weird).  You can research their benefits by clicking HERE, Fox News explains them perfectly!

Another, what I feel, secret that I found was Organic Bananas!!! I had to eat one right away, mainly because they looked horribly intimidating to me because I've been brainwashed to thinking bananas are actually bright yellow, so my brain kept thinking something was wrong with these. The first bite was firm and delicious! My husband is NOT a banana eater, but he LOVED these!!!! The taste was incomparable to a non-organic banana! I'm not sure what all those companies are doing and what I've been eating all these years, but they are not bananas.

It made me want to research these little fruits and find out what makes the taste and color so different! What I found was shocking! I mean, I always knew they had "stuff" on them, but never to the extent of what I found!

By eating Organic, this is what you're saving from entering your body: (In order by most to least percentage in a single banana) Below info was found HERE.

• 63% Thiabendazole (Toxin can cause Developmental or Reproductive problems and is a probable Carcinogen)
• 26% Imazalil (Toxin can cause Developmental or Reproductive problems and is a probably Carcinogen)
• 7.4% 5-Hydroxythiabendazole
• 4.2% Azoxystrobin 
• 2.0% o-Phenylphenol (Known Carcinogen, Causes Developmental or Reproductive problems and is a suspected Hormone Disruptor)
• 1.5% Pyrimethanil (Suspected Hormone Disruptor, Possible Carcinogen, Slight Bee Toxins)
• 1.1% Oxamyl oxime 
• 0.4% Chlorpyrifos (Contains Neurotoxins, Hormone Disruptor, and has High Bee Toxins)
• 0.3% Myclobutanil (Causes Developmental or Reproductive problems and Hormone Disruptor)
• 0.2% Bitertanol (Hormone Disruptor)
• 0.2% Carbendazim (MBC) (Hormone Disruptor, Slight Bee Toxins and Possible Carcinogen)
• 0.1% Carbaryl (Contains Neurotoxins, Causes Developmental or Reproductive problems, has High Bee Toxins, Hormone Disruptor, Probable Carcinogen)

To sum it all up, in every banana, you are putting 7 suspected Hormone Disruptors, 5 Developmental or Reproductive Toxins, 4 Known or Probable Carcinogens, 2 Neurotoxins and 2 Honeybee Toxins (which mainly effect the environment) --->> How CRAZY is that!!??!! All these pesticides don't even account for the amount of radiation in our fruit (radiation is to keep our fruit nice, bright, yellow and appealing! Is it really that important to peel a bright yellow or dingy yellow banana??)

I understand that buying Organic isn't feasible for everyone as it is a little pricier, but if you can...DO!! Those toxins are just bananas, what about strawberries, apples, carrots, lettuce!!! We wonder why our children are hitting puberty sooner and why Cancer is running around like a Terrorist!! We can change our lives and our children's by distilling healthy eating habits in us now!!

If you can't buy ALL Organic, here is a list of FRUITS from Highest to Lowest Pesticide Load:

• Peaches
• Apples
• Nectarines
• Strawberries
• Cherries
• Grapes
• Pears
• Raspberries
• Plums
• Oranges
• Tangerine
• Cantaloupe
• Lemon
• Honeydew
• Grapefruit
• Watermelon 
• Blueberries

VEGETABLES from Highest to Lowest Pesticide Load:

• Sweet Bell Peppers
• Celery
• Lettuce
• Spinach
• Potatoes
• Carrots
• Green Beans
• Hot Peppers
• Cucumbers
• Cauliflower
• Mushrooms
• Winter Squash
• Tomatoes
• Sweet Potatoes

As far as MEAT goes, I would recommend getting meat from a farmer who raises their cows free of antibiotics, no added hormones or human growth hormones. These animals are typically raised more ethically and humanely as well.

My curiosity sparked with a single banana and it led to so much more! I'm grateful that I purchased that banana and I cannot envision buying another non-organic fruit or feeding it to the ones God has entrusted me to take care of!! Some things, I won't be able to help, but this I can!!

Now that you know, what are you going to do??

I could NEVER do that!

"He who calls you is faithful, He will surely do it." ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:24

One phrase, as a homeschooling momma, that I hear most is, "Good for you for homeschooling, but I could 'Never' do that!"  Today, I received one of those comments and it got me thinking about my "Never"!

My oldest son went to Kindergarten and I had a heart as any other mom did: Sadness, happiness, anxiety... I LOVED his teacher and so did he! We are still friends and I value her wisdom! My son eventually had a bully on the bus :( You know that moment when they've been hiding in tears as to not get made fun of, but as soon as they see momma they just can't hold them back anymore?! Yeah, that was when God started working!

I contacted the school and the bus facility... it got a little better, but it didn't stop! I kept thinking, talking, praying, seeking and researching homeschooling. I didn't want to do it! I kept telling God all the reasons I couldn't do it... I don't have a degree in education, I haven't held a job in years, all my friends will be kid-free, I don't know anyone else who home schools! 

The Superintendent and I talked and worked out a part time schedule (as I still couldn't quit arguing with God that He actually knew more than me, hmmm). Tuesdays and Thursdays I had my boys! Both of their teachers were amazing and very supportive! Around November I caved! The boys finished the semester, wrote Thank You notes to the teachers and they gave them time in class to say, "Bye!" It was perfect, except now I didn't know what to do!

Luckily, I had a few friends that home schooled and a wonderful support group. I later joined a homeschool coop, which we attend every week and is one of the biggest blessings in my life.

My oldest doesn't love his math, but he's over a year advanced and loves to write, read and spell! My second struggles with reading, but is also over a year advanced in math and loves to draw and get creative. My daughter is sassy and smart! We have time to focus on what my kids love, they all three have a lesson a week and it doesn't take away a single evening of family time. We foster children and see our friends many times through the week. We serve others, go on a field trip at least once a month and spend lots of time outdoors.

I said, "I would never homeschool" too, but now God has showed me that my never wasn't His! It's funny the things He calls us to do. If we always got to do what we were the best at, than when would we ever lean on Him?! He has shown me that no degree or job teaches my child, it's the love that teaches them. It's God and how He uses me and guides me in training them for life. My prayer is that I listen!!

I pray I argue less with God in the future, but I take comfort in knowing that He knows when we will and when we need a little extra push!

God has called me to a road less travelled and I am grateful that He did!

"For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say." ~Luke 12:12

Question?...

Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance ~ Proverbs 1:5



I am sitting here with my husband after finishing up at a graduation party for a sweet high school girl and answered lots of questions about our foster children (which I LOVE to do!) I would much rather people ask, then sit and wonder! So, if you're curious, please ask :) I have decided to pull together, from memory, a list of questions that have been asked over the months! Enjoy :)


Q: Why did you decide to foster instead of just adopting?
A: We originally decided to adopt, so I called the agency to find out more about the process! She sent me information and in that packet, I seen a brochure about foster care. I called back to ask more and she filled me in on how Illinois only uses foster families and they are in GREAT need! Then, she said they had just turned away 3 week old twin baby girls! My heart sank! I called Dan and we decided to go in and talk more details...the rest is history!


Q: What is the process of becoming licensed like?
A: Starts off with a 13 week session of classes (3 hours each). You can choose between one per week from 6:00-9:00 pm or two a days (Saturday from 9-4 with an hour lunch) or two per week in the evening! There is also a required background check, fingerprinting, reference checks, three house visits, measurements and questions! During the sessions, you will have homework every week!


Q: How much does it cost?
A: Nothing! Our children need YOU and our state knows that!!! Good families are hard to find for these children who can't call a home a "home"!


Q: How many bedrooms do you need and how big?
A: Bedroom number and size depends on how many kids you wish to become licensed for! We are licensed for three at a time, we have three kids of our own and we have three bedrooms!! Each child requires 40 square feet each! Siblings of opposite sex can share a room under age 6, then need to be separated. We have a boys room and a girls room (4 boys and 2 girls)


Q: How long will you have him? Will you keep him?
A: The way the "system" works is based on 6 month increments, on court dates. Every 6 months, the mom/dad is reevaluated and the judge decides if the child will stay with the foster parent or return home. Our life with these children is based on 6 months at a time. I have the outlook that they will return home (as I sincerely do hope their parents get help and better), but if that were to change and the child was a good fit for our family...YES, we would have the choice to adopt!


Q: How do your kids feel about it?
A: We talked to our kids a lot before we decided to take this step and we are very open with them along the way. They love and have bonded very well to the children that have passed through our home. Elli has shown the biggest struggle with sharing momma more when a new kid comes, but after a few days, it balances out! I just have to make sure to shower the same attention and love on all my kids :) 


Q: How can you do it, love and release?
A: I think all parents release (to an extent) at some point in your children's lives. Letting go and praying that they keep their hearts turned to God! It's sorta the same for us! We have to let these kids go! We pray they have seen God when they were here and we pray they felt loved, but if they pass on from our home, we know their time with us was precious and valued. We pray for the children and their families. I know, as a momma, how hard it would be to not have your babies...so we pray! Another comfort that we have is knowing that God loves each of these kids far more than their birth parents, foster parents or respite care takers. He loves them SO much!!! That's where my strength lies!


Q: Why do you just have some kids for just a couple days?
A: That is respite care (babysitting provided by the state). We babysit kids due to foster parents going on vacation and one just needed a break! A respite provider is usually given second choice to adopt a child (if foster parents decline). Believe it or not, not all foster parents want to adopt!


Q: Can you strictly adopt out of the foster care program?
A: YES!!!!!!! Yes, you can! There is quite a substantial waiting list of children! Visit: AdoptUsKids to view the children who are waiting for a home!! 


This is just a few "off-the-top" questions that came to mind as I am writing, if you have one that's not listed, please ask! I do hope I answered some questions on this topic and hope you act on that nudge you may be feeling.


If you're reading this and you're simply just interested...you never know where or how God may use this knowledge :) My learning has definitely increased and I have heard the cry! Do you?

A Continuously Changing Family

And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me. ~Matthew 18:5


A lot has changed in the past few months in my life and I feel ready to start blogging it again! In October 2011, we got our Foster Parent License in the mail thinking, "Great! What next?" A month later, this happened!

"Ring, Ring" "Ring, Ring"

Me: "Hello!"
Amber: "Hi Kisha! How are you?"
Me: "Good, thanks!"
Amber: "Well, we have a child for you!"
Me: *Shocked and speachless at how fast...* "Okay..."
Amber: "He is two days old, his name is Ziekeal. He is African American and will be ready in about two hours." "Do you need to call Dan and talk about it?"
Me: "I know that Dan and I are here for this reason and we would love to have him in our home!"
Amber: "Sounds good. Meet me in two hours!

At that moment, I hung up and called Dan and then three good friends who provided everything I needed in those short two hours! Blessings indeed. In the next weeks I received an abundance for this sweet baby!

He is now over 6 months old, just cut two bottom teeth, started on baby food and loves to laugh, sleep, eat and poop! He is a joy and we are so blessed for saying, "Yes!" to that phone call on November 14, 2011! What a blessing!

In the weeks to follow, we had two other children come into our home (a brother and sister) and in the months to follow we had a 6 year old boy come through our home! In 6 months, we had 5 children pass through our home, some multiple times, one long term and one short term, but they each have left an impression.

I have seen the first hand need of foster parents or adoptive parents to adopt out of the foster system. These sweet kids are confused, unsure and probably scared, but they all have one thing in common...they all need love and routine! If your heart is even thinking about this area, I urge you to talk to someone you know, myself or call an agency!

One thing my husband and I have said from the beginning is, "Whatever the reason or the length of stay, every child who walks into our home will feel loved!" It's a simple concept we all know to well! I can't tell you how many times I hear, "It would be so hard, I could never do that (you know, love a child, care for a child with the very good possibility they will return home)" I can assure you that is not me, Dan or our family...It is God! He has softened and opened our hearts to children and we have faith that He will not leave us when the time comes for a child to return home. He has been with us thus far and I can assure you that we have needed and leaned on Him many times for comfort, peace and understanding!

I do know that God does not lay these lifestyles on the hearts of every family, but I do know there are some who are nervous to get started, scared, too many questions, etc. Just ask :)

Oh, and how do our kids feel about it? Ask them! I can tell you that I have never been more proud of my boys then seeing them take these younger kids under their wing! From holding their hands in a parking lot to wrapping their arm around them on a carnival ride! Seeing those moments gives me peace! I used to say, "I pray my kids have a passion for children when they are older!" But, it's funny...I already see it!!!


I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me! ~ Matthew 25:40